Need of the hour -15
Is a Calm child a cute child!!!….
-J.P.Bharathi
Can we confidently say there is any creation on earth which does not want attention?
Can we say in this nature, we can do away with at least few things without any second thought or hesitation?
If the answer is “NO”, then how can we say that a child will remain calm and composed without rebelling for anything?
In this pandemic situation, many times we are forced to stay indoors. How do we use our time effectively and build some innovative thoughts to engage our kids at home, let’s see…
Including anything and everything on earth, we can say everyone needs attention. Both living and non living things on this earth need attention. Living things will deter, decay and get depressed without proper attention. When comes to non living things, they evaporate, diminish and deteriorate over a period of time. So when an individual shows out his expressions, vengeance or anger, it is an urge and a request seeking attention from people around. Similarly, even a child uses tantrums to show his importance and also get his due attention. As parents, we need to give that attention to every child, for a healthy growth and development.
So, if your child shows out such signals, try these ways to calm down your child and divert his energy towards positive thinking,
- Open a conversation and Listen carefully
Generally, conversation will allow your thoughts to proceed into a next level. It will allow the dialogue happen between people and help you to become more reasonable in your thinking. So your child will be sensible enough to realize, he is stupid at times. And if he can realize this, he might as well forget everything and go for a play. If not, satisfy his reasonable demands. Also tell him, that next time he should behave more sensible and should not irritate or get agitated.
- Check if the child had his meal
Usually, if the child is hungry, he does not want to think. So calm him down and let him have his meal peacefully. If your child is reluctant to eat his meal help him with water, fruit juice or any liquids. When your child thinks in his cool mind, he understands the family situations and gets closer to you and gives a proper solution to his own problem. This will be a beautiful way to end the rift in a family.
- Help him to relax and sleep for a while
Ask your child why he is agitated and tell him to relax and sleep. Assure him that in the mean time you will think and come out with a possible solution. As your child is anyway tired, he will like the suggestion. Once he gets up, pretend to be all set and focused, involve him in a dialogue, and ask for detail. You can find a solution within the problem he mentioned. If he did not like the idea of sleeping, ask him to close his eyes and remain silent for a while. With all these suggestions, he will feel comfortable, that he is heard and given proper time and attention in the family. Sometimes, all he wants is only proper time and attention.
- Put the child to thinking
Still, in few situations, we may not get a readymade solution for few problems. Also check if had his shower and is feeling clean and fresh. When he is busy with his shower, tell him that you will consult elders or experts around. Never shout and say that he is stupid. He will never like it and he is sure to lose faith on your capacity. You can also tell him, that he was wiser enough as a child to think sensibly. Narrate the past experiences, where your child was very smart enough to take his decisions properly. He will slowly start believing in himself and reduce his temper tantrums as he grows in age.
- Ask the child to suggest few solutions
As your child comes out with his suggestions, start listing out along with him. Find out from him, if he had an argument, fight with anyone at play or school. If so listen carefully. Ask him if he is upset with that issue and help him to come to terms and apologise if there is a need. Let him voice which one would be more reasonable for him and others around him. Inculcate, moral, ethical and social values, so that he will be more concerned and sensitive while taking his final decision. This will help him to become an empathetic person in this society.
Relate past instances when your child was reasonable in his decisions
- Always encourage your child
Always encourage your child and tell him that he is very good. Even at times when he gets unreasonable, and his decision is not so good; try to be on his side. If his decision is not harming anyone, then go ahead to fulfill his desire. Slowly, get some logic prevail in his decision making capacity.
Always try and develop some passions, hobbies and a free time hobby which will relax his mind. All hobbies work like food for thought and will try to remove negative energy in your child and help him to be patient, cool and calm in his life.
Every child will learn from his own mistakes and grows in life. When his mistake is not so big, excuse him and let him have his way. Every time, encourage him to become judicious in his thinking. A child, who knows being calm is very important, will never show his tantrums. He can understand to be rational in his thoughts and will never get agitated even when he grows up into an adult.
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